Ah, how annoying. You finally meet a boy you actually like because let’s face it you rarely meet a man you are attracted to because hello, the hotties are like now facing extinction and this one well he kind of meets your criteria, he is making you laugh.. kind of and you are spending most weekends with him. He is pretty much your boyfriend but something doesn’t feel right and I am here to write those 5 signs that even though you really want him to be the one, he isn’t …
- You are pretending to be something you are not
By this I mean you are perhaps pretending to like the things he does whether it is his football team or the disgusting cheap club he hangs out every weekend with his immature friends. In my case, I would even pretend to like the steaks he made which tasted really bland but because I really liked him I would be like ‘OMG, this is so tasty like wow, who taught you to cook like that?’ or pretend that I had a good time at the club he took me to where we had to queue for 30 minutes only to get in and have a woman repeatedly try to grab my YSL purse and him just standing there. ‘Yes I had such a great time!’ No, not really- my heels are all sticky and my purse almost got stolen so thanks for one of the lamest nights of my life.
- He puts you down
This is a classic one. Insecure boys will always put you down or make you feel bad about yourself. If you have more degrees than him he will speak about it negatively, this man is always in competition with you. Instead of being proud of you and inspiring you, he will remind you all the things that you lack but he has. You don’t want to be with a man like this because inside he is a little boy who can only feel good about himself by putting you down. Your husband will be proud of all your degrees, your countless friends, the way you dress, your job, whatever. This one is just jealous, all day everyday therefore will try and make you feel bad about yourself as this is the only way he some shady upper hand.
- He doesn’t have future plans
I am not saying he should have a dissertation printed and bound with his ten year life plan but if he is over 28 he should really know what he is passionate about and what he likes. A man who doesn’t have a plan for his own future has no plans with you in the future either. I mean this guy probably cannot even make dinner reservations because he does not like to make plans therefore you end up having date night in some crappy restaurant and you haven’t even been married to him for ten years. It is the beginning and he is already being super lazy… I mean your make up is on point, you could have been wining and dining with your girlfriends somewhere cute after a long week
- You are dimming your light
By this I mean you are downplaying your intelligence, pretending you didn’t know about something i.e the news, or a fact or some history when he tells you something just because you know he feels so good when he THINKS he is teaching you something new. Or you are typing ‘lol’ loads on messages or pretending to giggle at his mediocre jokes which you really don’t understand but you really want this to work so you are gonna ha ha ha and damn you are gonna ha ha ha hard.
- You are drinking loads
I always believe if you are really having a good time, you don’t really need more than one or two drinks because you are already so excited and have butterflies in your stomach but if you find that the two of you are going through bottles, it is because you need it to tolerate him. Everything just seems so great with a glass of red no? but really in all reality you know he is not that funny or the kind, family, ambitious man he makes himself out to be.
But yes you ignored all the five signs because dammit, you want to be in love too! have super cute babies one day but don’t let the fear of being alone make you fall for the wrong guy. There is a man out there who will fit you like the perfect glove and be proud of the good woman that you are and actually really make you laugh so hard that you cry. I think society puts so much pressure on us women that by a certain age we should be married, have a house and a kid that we start looking for good things in the wrong men.
It’s easy to get caught up in the moment and think everything is OK when you really want a fairy tale King but like the saying, if you keep entertaining court jesters how will you ever meet a King? So wipe those tears, adjust your crown and let him go.